Rant – World of Warcraft
Rod: How many times do I have to tell you…heirlooms can’t be shared!
Barry: I think you’re lying. You’re just being mean. How did you get them anyway? I thought you had to be max level to get those?
Rod: I have a maxed out character. Now, shut up and quit being a noob.
Barry: What’s a noob?
Rod: It’s someone who knows nothing about the game and is unwilling to really learn, always wanting someone to do stuff for them and tell them everything.
Barry: Hey, I want to really learn! I mean, you’ve only been helping me for 12 hours, and I’m already level 10. Isn’t that progress? Oh, and thanks for killing all those ugly fish things for me. Am I done with that quest?
Rod: I rest my case.
Barry: How did you get a maxed out character? How much have you really been playing this game? I mean, if it takes 12 hours just to get level 10, it would take a LONG time to get there.
Rod: Not if you’re like me and you know how to play.
Barry: Hey, someone is talking to me. They want to know if I want to buy gold. What do I say?
Rod: NO! Never do that. That’s against the game rules. Plus, it’s insulting to all the players in the game who work hard to level their characters and get all their stuff the right way and earn their gold.
Barry: Well, ok, if you say so.
Rod: Would not do you any good anyway…you’d still be a noob.
<The phone rings, and Barry answers it.>
Barry: Hello? Yes, Rod is here, but he’s busy. Who is this? Ok, I’ll give him the message. <Click.>
Rod: Well, who was it?
Barry: It was the kid down the street. He said your check for buying a max character with a ton of gear and heirlooms bounced.
Rod: Uh oh…but I really do know how to play the game. I just…I could not bear wasting all that time to get my toon to max level. I wanted to get there fast. But…
Barry: But what?
Rod: I guess that’s why they kicked me out of a group last week. They said I was playing like someone who didn’t know how to use my powers.
Barry: Now who’s the noob.
Rod: Oh shut up and help me make some gold.
Barry: Why should I?
Rod: Well, we’ve got to find a way to pay that kid. We can sell some gold.
Barry: But why do I care if he’s mad at you?
Rod: I forged one of your checks.
Barry: NOOB!!!